one time i said john kraskinski’s greatest achievement was becoming emily blunt’s husband and my mom got offended she was like “what if you said that about a woman” and i was like “if some woman married emily blunt that would also be her greatest achievement what’s your point”
considering acquiring a bunch of haunted dolls and putting two at a time in a salt circle and not letting them out until one has destroyed the other. i will continue this until only one (1) doll, imbued with a hatred of humanity due to what i’ve done to it, is left, and then release that doll upon the world. it will, of course, immediately slaughter me but it’ll be worth it to know i engineered the harbringer of the apocalypse. the world will end on my terms
Vex taking Trinket out for a long walk together in the woods, saying very little except for telling bits of stories, remembering old adventures, and finally having her first good cry since Vasselheim.
Grog having no damn idea when his birthday is, but Pike picking an appropriate day anyway and bringing him something from all the girls at the bakery, which is easily the best thing he’s ever tasted.
Molly commemorating a year since a lonely, terrifying awakening with the most sybaritic night possible, partly as a celebration and partly as a grinning middle finger to the universe. He only gets to do it twice.
Percy always remembering to bring Cassandra something: one proper present for the woman she is (as advised by Vex), and one frivolous little trinket for the years they missed (always, always handmade).
Jester, alone in her room, hugging her new, pretty sketchbook to her chest, and thinking of all the wonderful things she’s going to draw for her very best friend.
Scanlan’s first birthday present to Kaylie after he finally figures out the date, and the whole thing’s a bit of an awkward mess, but it’s heartfelt, and it ends with the two of them playing music together, so that’s all right.
Caleb remembering childhood birthdays, despite efforts not to.
Keyleth, cycling through year after decade after century until the particulars slip away, but the ravens come to remind her, because someone never forgets.
my big idea for a superhero movie is that one scene in thor ragnarok where matt damon has a cameo but it’s all the time. you have your ensemble cast of up and coming actors nobody recognizes but literally every single extra is a household name. the protagonist goes to a coffee shop and the barista is chris evans. they turn on the news and the anchor is mark hamill talking to correspondent daniel radcliffe. the final battle happens and the group of civilians the protagonist has to save is just the cast of love actually. cate blanchett has an after credits scene where she asks the protagonist for an autograph, addressed to her real name, cate blanchett. at no point does anyone acknowledge this.
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