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gallusrostromegalus:

gallusrostromegalus:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

gallusrostromegalus:

Things you can do for your future self that you will really appreciate:

Caramelize, like, a whole ton of onions.

Really, get a whole ass bag of yellow onions, peel, chop, cry, put on a podcast and start stirring those tasty bastards. Delgaze every so often. Do like, 12, 15 onions until they’re a thick, dark brown paste of flavor then spoon them into an ice cube tray and freeze.

So later, when you’re tired and Don’t want fast food again, or it’s 3AM after a meds adjustment and you need curry right the fuck now, or it’s family dinner night and you want to look like an adult, sad, tired, mentally wobbly future you can crack open the freezer, dump a cube or three in the pan with the chicken or curry or stuffing and get all that delicious goodness delivered to your brain without the effort of a hot stove right then.

So next time you have three hours to kill and want to do some self care,

Caramelize so many fucking onions.

i’ve posted  before about the concerned looks i get from grocery store employees due to my regular habit of purchasing 40+ onions for caramelization purposes. they’re great in sandwiches

pro tips: 

  • use butter instead of oil
  • low heat + lots of time = carmalezation magic
  • freeze in a large freezer bag squished flat
  • they shrink in the pan, you’ll only get < ¼ the volume you start with.
  • they last ages in the fridge

1. Do they not have Costo in your home dimension?

2. Personally I love the flavor of onion, esp the caramelized goodness, but can’t fucking stand the texture of onion so I cook them extra long, deglaze with the white wine people kept giving me as housewarming presents despite the fact I don’t drink to get the Fond AKA THE GOOD SHIT off the bottom/destroy the cell structure more, then ran them through the food processor to make… Like apple butter, but with Caramelized Onions.

It’s still really good on sandwiches, esp grilled cheese.  You can also just add it to stock or salad dressings too!

3. You’re 100% right about using butter it works so much better.  I think the browning of the butter adds a lot of flavor that you wouldn’t get with an oil.

4. … I should try this with the duck fat next time.  That’d be baller.

5. You can also chop up your fresh herbs and store them in butter (which also freezes great) so they last longer and then you also have herb butter for either cooking or toast.

So this was a 3 AM shit post about my love of caramelized onions and people are tagging it as #life hacks, #meal prep or fucking #adulthood like I’m some put together kind of person with a skincare routine and not a walking disaster that decided to make lamb curry at 2AM.

But. I guess I can take it as a sign that maybe I’m not as much of a mess as I think I am.

To make herb butter btw-. Don’t melt the butter just leave it covered out on the counter until it’s really soft (time varies by region) then scoop it into a resealable bowl, add you chopped herbs and mix, then cover and put back in the fridge.

Due to the introduction of plant matter herb butter is less shelf stable than unaltered butter and should not be left in a butter dish, but you can take it out an hour or so before you use it in front of guests to slow-soften it again.

Violet Beauregarde should‘ve won Wonka’s chocolate factory

earendil-elenion:

evayna:

Have I watched the movie in the last decade or more? No.
Do I have iron clad evidence to support my argument? Yes.

1. She’s the most knowledgeable about candy. She’s committed to it, and knows her stuff. When Wonka holds up a little yellow piece across the room, she recognizes it immediately. She was able to switch to candy bars for the sake of the contest, so we know she has personal discipline and is goal oriented. Also, two major projects play directly into her strong suits: the 3-course-meal gum that Wonka failed to make safe (gum) and the neverending gobstopper (longevity).

2. She’s the most fit to run a business. Violet is competitive, determined, hard working, and willing to take risks. Her father is a small town car salesman and politician, so she could easily pick up knowledge and support from him. (Veruca’s dad is also a business man, and in a compatible market (nuts), but it’s made very clear that Veruca has no respect or knowledge of business practices or hard work.)

3. She’s the most sympathetic to the Oompa Loompas. She critiques Veruca when Veruca demands to buy one. More importantly, Wonka has been testing the 3-course-meal gum that ‘always goes wrong’ on Oompa Loompas while he presumably just watches. Violet is ready to put herself on the front line, instead of treating the Oompa Loompas as disposable, and would therefore be a better boss.

4. Her personality ‘flaw’ is the most fitting for the company. In the moralizing Oompa Loompa song, they just say ‘gum is pretty cool, but it’s not socially acceptable to chew it all day‘. The thing is, we already know that she can stop if she wants, because she already did that to win the golden ticket. And yeah, she is defensive about the perceived impoliteness of her hobby (like when her mother tries to shame her about her habit during a televised interview) but the obsession with candy and neglect of social norms is EXACTLY what Wonka is all about. This is on brand.

5. Her misstep in the factory is reasonable. Wonka shows everyone a candy he’s very proud of. Violet is like “oh sick, that’s gum, my special interest.” Wonka is then pulls a “WRONG! It’s amazing gum!” So in the very moments before she takes the gum Wonka has mislead her just to belittle her. So when he’s like “I wouldn’t do that” why should she give a shit what he has to say? She’s not like Charlie over here who’s all “Sure Gramps, let’s stay behind while the tour leaves and secretly drink this thing that has been explicitly stated to fill you with gas and is too powerful for safe consumption, oh and also I just saw what happened to Violet so I actually KNOW what this stuff can be capable of” Also, Violet is not selfish about her experience, she tells everyone what she’s tasting and feeling, and everyone is eager to hear it. Taking a personal risk to share knowledge with everyone. Violet is Prometheus: fact.

So Augustus contaminates the chocolate river. Charlie sneaks around and contaminates the vent walls. Veruca destroys and disrupts the workspace. Mike knows exactly what will happen to him and transports/shrinks himself deliberately. Violet had no idea what the gum could potentially do to her, and caused no harm to anyone or anything but herself.

Lastly: Can you imagine Charlie filling Wonka’s shoes? That passive, naive boy? Violet is already basically Wonka. She’s passionate, sarcastic, candy-obsessed, free thinking, and a total firecracker. She’s even better than Wonka, because she doesn’t endanger others.

Violet should’ve been picked to inherit the chocolate factory.